Happy 2nd Birthday, Peyton Lynn!

2 years...wow.

It’s been two years since I gave birth to you. Peyton, you were the most beautiful little sleeping beauty that I have ever seen. You were so perfect. So beautiful. Just like your sister and brothers. I can’t believe it’s been two years since I saw you for the first time, two years since I felt the weight of your tiny little body in my arms. Two years since I kissed your sweet little face. Two years since I hugged you. Two years ago I laid in a hospital bed trying to memorize every little part of you, baby girl. I was only going to have a few moments with you and I needed to make those moments count. In ways, this year has been easier on my heart than last year...but in ways it’s been harder. I find myself frustrated with time. Time has put such a distance between us. I am thankful for that...but I am also mad about it. Time has helped me heal but time has also moved so fast, that it’s putting such a long distance between the time I first held you to now. I’m thankful for it, but I also resent it. We haven’t forgotten about you Peyton. We still miss you and think about you every single day. Your big brother just realized what happened to you and it shattered his heart into a million pieces. He cries for you now...he actually mourns you now. He finally grasps the reality of what happened and what we are missing out on with you. You are a big sister now, sweet girl. Of course, you already know that. I know that you helped pick out our precious Jaxon just for us. And I know you are so excited that he is here with us. Thank you for doing such an amazing job. We are so thankful for him. And he will forever be thankful for you. He will forever have such a special tie to you. Peyton Lynn, girlfriend, you have changed so many lives here on earth. You did more in your short little life than some can do in YEARS. You have touched so many lives. You have changed so many lives for the good. You made me a better mommy. You brought me closer to God. You made me more thankful for life itself. God sure did have some BIG plans for you from the start. Today, I refuse to be sad. We will celebrate you and what you mean to us. We will be happy and rejoice in the Lord because sweet Peyton, we will all see you again one day. And what a day that will be. I love you, baby girl. ❤️Mommy